WARNING: COMMON SENSE REQUIRED
Do not proceed if you don’t have any. Thank you.
Doddery. Senile. Crazy. Half-Baked. Looney. Screwball. Crackpot. Fruitcake. Nut Case. No, I’m not talking about a cooking recipe here people! Work with me on this dodos!
Thankfully, I’m blessed (or arguably goddamned) with a baldpate and an ever germinating inner sanctum with my spontaneous combustion (no, I’m not talking about my bed escapades…you like that don’t you, you perverts!) to shepherd (and sheep herd) fellow humans who have lost their way of life (applicable to only persons who had a life) and tumbled into *timbuktu. To start you senseless people on the path to righteousness (or lefteousness if you’re left-handed), please read the following epos:
Hey fiddle diddle, tiddle on me widdle,
Wooply doodly doo, a boohoo in the goo,
And me willy winkle tinkles!
(Copyright Daniel Franklin. WARNING: Recreating the Secret Ritual of Common Sense will lead to prosecution and my shoe up your butt)
REPEAT 12X and and soon, you’ll be singing La Cucaracha with a crocodile thong on and a shoe up your butt! Walla! Your therapy is now complete.
Money talks and bullshit walks, thus, necessitating a real need to engage my cosmopolitan mental capacity to formulate a piss-gulping vehicle (win a noble “piss” prize), so that all of MEN could piss themselves away to a cheaper, no-frills and ammonia-polluted environment! (FOR LADIES : FLUNNELS ARE REQUIRED FOR BETTER TRAJECTORY).
Time to start growing money on trees!
*timbuktu : A city in central Mali near the Niger river; formerly famous for its gold trade.
And you thought the place didn’t exist, you Santa Claus regicide!I would like to thank money (or the lack of it) for the inspiring this entry. (INSERT MIDDLE FINGER HERE) Brouhahaha!
A Year Ago
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