How Well Do You Know Us Men?
SharePosted on 10. Sep, 2007 by Gallivanter in Thoughts
DO
1. DO remember that your guy is not you. Besides being male, he was raised differently and has his own habits and preferences that are as treasured and comfortable as yours are to you.
2. DO keep in mind that he wasn’t put on earth to read your mind and bring you everything you desire. A relationship is a work in progress and to be successful it must continually be negotiated to benefit both of you.
3. DO open yourself to learn about his half of the complaint when conflicts erupt, which they will. Only by agreeing to find a resolution that suits both of you can your love flourish and become increasingly safe and trustworthy.
4. DO be generous in expressing your affection, desire, and joy in being with him each and every day – both verbally and physically.
5. DO remember that you chose to be with him and that the ways he is different provide you the spiritual inspiration to learn to love him even better.
6. And DO receive all of his loving, caring, helpful and romantic gestures even when they don’t match your preconceived ideas about how intimacy should be. Take them in as acknowledgments of your value and allow yourself to be changed by love.
DON’T
7. DON’T believe that relationships come ready made. They are an art form, a community effort. They are the product of your joined discoveries, intentions, and willingness to follow where love takes you, or not.
8. DON’T fly into a rage just because he’s done something that makes you angry. He is not your whipping boy. And since you claim to love him now is the time to practice that love as an act of respect for his feelings and find a way to express your unhappiness in a way that is still respectful of yourself and of your man.
9. DON’T compare him to your friends’ husbands, your old boyfriend or, worse yet, your fantasy Mr. Perfect. If you do he can only fail, because he can’t be anyone but himself.
10. DON’T blame him if the relationship is not going the way you want. The two of you have been equal forces shaping what you have right from the very beginning. If you need to change something, let him know more about who you are and what you need.
11. DON’T pigeon hole him into “all men” otherwise you’ll miss out on seeing him on his own terms and he is a one of a kind guy, no matter what he has in common with other men.
12. DON’T ever assume you know all there is know about him. Remain curious and learn more. Make it safe for him to reveal his fears, sadness, regrets – any tender and vulnerable feelings – by valuing the love and trust it takes for him to give you the gift of his inner life.
This is something I found online, albeit with a little modification
Olieee
Sep 10th, 2007
Wow beautifully put in words!
Rudy
Sep 10th, 2007
*hugs* All youladies…today’s verse is important so percolate please
I agree
*Best Friend Gives Gallivanter high five and decides against mooning him*
*hugs instead*
lol
pris
Sep 10th, 2007
a very good info indeed!!..
WanderingSumandak
Sep 10th, 2007
hahahah…i know for a fact that if a guy says “Can we discuss about this some other times?” means “just drop it, okay”
*LOL*
charlenediane
Sep 10th, 2007
Ooo something that will def come in handy for us women.
Not like we didn’t know already in the first place, but I guess we just don’t care! Heh, heh.
Jewelle
Sep 10th, 2007
Ok we hear you
Now do you hear us too? 
Gallivanter
Sep 10th, 2007
Olieee It hits the nail on the head.
Rudy
pris Yes, hope it helps, use it wisely.
WanderingSumandak Well, it depends on the guy, we will eventually talk about it.
charlenediane If you don’t care then how can you expect the relationship to work?
Jewelle We do hear you, in most parts.
Giddy Tiger
Sep 10th, 2007
You know, we often hear of men complaining that they don’t understand women. But sometimes it is good to hear it from the guys’ perspective too… and you put it really well…
Faiez
Sep 10th, 2007
Yes Dr Phil, I agree with all of the above. Now… please help me with my problem. Why am I a sucker for men that is not even in my time zone? But anyway, I am in sceptic mode today. I have a quote for everyone:
As said by Mrs Jane Smith:
Happy ending is a story that doesn’t end yet.
Ok takde kena mengena, or maybe there is?
p/s: Eh bro, you basically stay less than 5 mins away from me, jom pi mamak?
julian sabah
Sep 10th, 2007
(clap clap clap)
I hear u brother… (tears rolling down)… T_T
marsha
Sep 11th, 2007
donwan. dont want to agree. I reverse everything! ha ha ha ha!
Gallivanter
Sep 11th, 2007
Giddy Tiger Yes, and I hope that this entry was not shared in vain.
Faiez Men not in your timezone? Maybe it’s because you can “never” get them, and as humans, we’re suckers for challenges? Mamak? Can can – sometime this week boleh? I was thinking of hitting a karaoke joint this Friday, interested?
julian sabah Cheers buddy. *WIPES THE TEARS OFF HIS FACE AND OFFERS HIM A PINT OF KILKENNY*
marsha You evil person you.