Comments on: Women Giving up Their Surnames After Marriage

By: WanderingSumandak

WanderingSumandak — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 16:05:41 +0000

unofficially, i’d like to be referred to as Mrs. Who (future husband’s surname). officially, i’d like to retain my own surname. it’s only a personal preference actually. i think having a surname generations after generations is a good way to trace back our ancestors. take me for instance, i don’t even know my great grandfather’s name!

By: Gallivanter

Gallivanter — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:56:45 +0000

Olie – Is that what society makes us think, that double surnames means you’re part of the family and that she’s married?

By: Olie

Olie — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:16:04 +0000

Adapting the double surnames like Jewelle mentioned in her post : being a part of his family…
Number two it shows that she’s married.. heh,heh,heh… so when ppl saw her name then they won’t kacau. Self explanatory double surnames..
Plus not only she gets to keep her own surname… she gets to add your surname too… so no stress on her side.

By: Gallivanter

Gallivanter — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 14:30:37 +0000

tekkaus – Possibly, but I think culture has to be set aside and let the heart/mind decide.

babypose – Respect.

Nadia – Interesting that it gives a fresh perspective?

By: Nadia

Nadia — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 11:10:15 +0000

hihi.. yup it’s doesnt bother anyway, but i think using husband’s name is quite interesting..huahua.. Mrs Nadia Kristalandra?? sounds weird la..hihi

By: babypose

babypose — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 05:52:32 +0000

cool topic. depends on individual, rather keep mine.

By: tekkaus

tekkaus — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:47:41 +0000

I think it depends on the couples and their respective cultures.

By: Gallivanter

Gallivanter — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 14:09:37 +0000

Thank you for all your wonderful comments.

Amanda – I’m not sure what’s normal about double surnames, but I think that’s the only thing I disagree.

earthy emily – Yes, but as much as we want to listen to our voices of reason, we get bitten by society.

Diarmuid Curran – Great comment. We hang out to our surnames to remind us of where we come from, except if you’re ancestors were javanese pirates.

Tine – Cool.

sweetie~ – I don’t know, I think double surnames are a cop-out, a fence sitter. But that’s just me la.

Nick Phillips – Exacto mundo.

ladyviral – That’s the spirit, I’m just trying to understand why some women feel the need to do so though.

Alv0808 – Your future husband shouldn’t ask you to change it, it should be on your own accord. Women are no longer slaves la.

chegu carol – Ah, a practical answer, makes more sense.

cicak – Definitely, but define “personal preference”, I bet you it’s not a literal meaning.

Daniel Chiam – Agreed, keep close to your heritage and culture, but more, hold on to your values.

Mimi – Changing names after converting to Islam isn’t compulsory so to speak, but “encouraged” by Malaysian Muslims – speaking from experience.

Jewelle – Cool. I respect that, though I may not agree with it. Again, that’s just my own personal views.

dena – Edmund Shanmugam? *TRIES HARD NOT TO LAUGH* Sounds like some Klang gangster. I don’t know, I still prefer Mel to either keep her name as Emelda Vincent or go with Emelda Gomez, just no in betweens, because some part of me still feels that it’s a cop-out, but maybe I’ll change my mind about it in the future.

By: dena

dena — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 08:39:15 +0000

Hmm..up to the individual preference I think, but I didnt give up mine. Vicent Gomez still sound right ba, not with Edmund Shanmugam hahaha, funny betul tu

By: Jewelle

Jewelle — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:46:18 +0000

As you know, I’m one who does the double surname thing. Its more to show that I am now a part of another family (his). My choice. It’s also unofficial as on all official document, I am still using my original name.

By: Mimi

Mimi — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:28:32 +0000

Like Nick, this issue never crossed my mind.. Furthermore, being Islam.. I don’t really have the choice or even preference to begin with. But I ALWAYS have problem with my full name because it’s so masculine that I am so close to changing it to just Mimi.. but that will definitely hurt my dad’s feeling.

BTW, I also question why people change their names when they convert to Islam.. Is it compulsory?

By: Daniel Chiam

Daniel Chiam — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:10:47 +0000

Quite interesting. As a male, I too dont mind about the choice that my future wife would make. but if i were to be put into a female shoes, then i would still keep my surname no matter what. I know its just a name and changing it wont change a thing about ourself but having a chinese blood in me, i think the name really define who i am, what i am, and where i came from.

Once an aunty told me to drop my surname and use a more local surname so that it would be easier for me to apply to local uni, get a job with the govt and so on, but for me i think its ridiculous, because it just shows how narrow minded these people are. you dont just leave your heritage and identity behind just because you want an easy way to get to the top. sorry, rambling thoughts there..

By: cicak

cicak — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:05:03 +0000

I think taking surnames after marriage is just a matter of personal preference, no?

IMO keeping the family name is cool.

By: chegu carol

chegu carol — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 06:58:48 +0000

i am still caroline charles even after i become mrs alvin ting. but having 8 ppl with the exact same name in Sabah alone and once had a bank called me telling ive delayed my car loan payment for 2 months when i dont even own a car yet (later, it was cleared, it was a different person) plus a few encounters involving my name, i sometimes thought it would be a good idea.

By: Alv0808

Alv0808 — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 05:44:41 +0000

I keep my name unless my future husband ask me to change it. In that case, I’ll take double surname..

By: ladyviral

ladyviral — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 05:39:05 +0000

Doesn’t bother me anyway. I still know myself . Besides, my husband doesn’t bother either hahaha.

By: Nick Phillips

Nick Phillips — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 03:41:59 +0000

I never ever actually thought about this until you posted about it. I’m okay with it either way cos like you said, it’s only a name on a paper.

By: sweetie~

sweetie~ — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 01:47:30 +0000

reasons:

1. i dont want to lose my root
2. i’m proud to be married to my husband….hehe
3. in case anything happen in the future….then not so difficult to ‘reclaim’ myself…huhu

By: sweetie~

sweetie~ — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 01:43:58 +0000

i think i’d love the double surname….mmm

By: Tine

Tine — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 22:38:34 +0000

When I moved to Australia after I got married, a lot of people assumed my last name to be my husband’s, when it fact, it’s mine. It’s not that I don’t love my husband, or being married, but I think I shouldn’t have to give up that part of me which, I think, still belonged to the people who brought me up with love. Instead of Mrs So and So, I retained a Ms. Nothing wrong with that at all.