A Woman’s Thought Process When Selecting a Partner
SharePosted on 06. Jan, 2010 by Gallivanter in Gender, Relationship
In the current society we live in, long gone are the days where you can just live on love. Eagles’ misled us when they sang “love will keep us alive”. While the gist of it may ring true to some extent, these days, love comes with a whole lot of appurtenances, especially in pecuniary form.
I know someone who claimed that she had a tough choice determining her manly options as both suitors had their own strengths and weaknesses.
One one corner stands a very loving man, handsome but not really well-to-do, and the other corner, a not-so-loving fellow, rich as hell but ugly as hell too. She is undecided.
Herein lies the dilemma. My question to my women readers – What would you opt for if you were in her shoes? What would be your criteria?
I know that love cannot be everything in life, as balance is needed, but the scale of balance can be very subjective. Ultimately, money can be earned but not love. There is no price for love.
TerraShield
Jan 6th, 2010
Well, certainly just 3 pieces of information as presented is not enough to make such a life changing decision. Given a choice, and of course more attributes to compare with, I’d certainly pick the one who’s more intelligent. Nothing is sexier than that!
Nadia
Jan 6th, 2010
I prefer a very loving man, handsome but not really well-to-do ….
eiling
Jan 6th, 2010
I think being loving is the 1st criteria. But one cannot survive only with love in reality. I prefer the non extremes like ugly as hell and rich as hell but probably I can except not so good looking and well – to -do! heheh…
eiling
Jan 6th, 2010
Sorry typo – should accept and not except…
I think being loving is the 1st criteria. But one cannot survive only with love in reality. I prefer the non extremes like ugly as hell and rich as hell but probably I can except not so good looking and well – to -do! heheh…
Sarah
Jan 6th, 2010
I agree with Terra. I choose intelligence too. I love intelligent men hehe.
sriyany
Jan 6th, 2010
I would go for the not so well-to-do guy..after all, the rich guy could easily lose all his money and you’d be left with an ugly idiot in the end
Nick Phillips
Jan 6th, 2010
I think you said it well when you said ‘money can be earned but not love.’
Amanda
Jan 6th, 2010
duh, of course handsome and loving man. whats the use of women having degree certs?
deana
Jan 6th, 2010
most women will go for love but not money but for those who chose money, i just cant blame them.in this world that we are living, it’s hard to survive with love alone.it’s a choice afterall.
lizee
Jan 6th, 2010
Handsome & loving man. After all, financial situation can change over time…The other one seems like a dead end – I’d end up with an ugly man and a loveless marriage for the rest of my life. Money can’t change that.
sweetie~
Jan 6th, 2010
I’ve met the guy that has everything in my list but still no chemistry…..so i wud say it’s all abt feelings….so it’s very subjective….but he must at least has a stable income…..hahaha
sweetie~
Jan 6th, 2010
to her dilemma…..choose the loving man….can find money anywhere….life will be tragical w/out love….huhu
xin
Jan 6th, 2010
i am sure there is a loving, handsome and rich man somewhere out there. LOL
Merryn
Jan 6th, 2010
A not-so-loving fellow, rich as hell but ugly as hell too? What is there to think? NO way for this ugly dude! lol.. it’s ok if he is ugly, it’s ok if he is rich as hell.. but he aint loving.. wat’s the use? No money in the world can buy you love!
Unless.. I go with him, for his money.. and spend it with that very loving man, handsome but not really well-to-do! Can’t blame me can you? As that ugly dude aint no loving man!
Mimi
Jan 6th, 2010
I think for me, your friend should ask herself, which of the 2 suitors she loves the most that she’s willing to go through bad & good times together. I chose my man not based on his look, nor his earning.. Basically, I believe in having the “chemistry” and that it can really go a long way, it makes decision making in life much easier later on. And making money together easier too!
Gallivanter
Jan 6th, 2010
TerraShield – Cool.
Nadia – Love’s the only rule ey?
eiling – Thanks for sharing.
Sarah – Cool!
sriyany – Well said!
Nick Phillips – Cheers.
Amanda – Ahhh, equality.
deana – Yes, but you haven’t answered the question. Your reply is a little politically correct.
lizee – Nice thought.
sweetie – Yeah, a balance is needed, but chemistry is very important indeed. I’m guessing this girl does not have the chemistry with either one of them, hence the “dilemma”.
xin – Of course, but he’d probably won’t go after a girl like this, who is undecided over trivial matters.
Merryn – Hahahahaha! Thanks for sharing!
Mimi – She said she could grow to love both, so I can say there is zilch chemistry with both men. And this is the “quiet” girl I blogged about in my previous post.
Choc Mint Girl
Jan 6th, 2010
I so agree with you that money can be earned, but not love or ‘true’ love. Some people can fake their love just to rip their partners off.
Anyway, back to your question, I have actually listed out a few men before whom I really wanted to go out, which I never thought I would do such things haha…, but in the end I chose the man who is now I am married to.
So, if I were in her shoes, I would definitely pick the one who loves me most, the first guy. Handsome some more. LOL! Not well-to-do, but he got a job, right?!
Seriously, I think she needs to feel the sparks between these two men and decide which one makes her happy the most. Happiness is extremely important in a relationship.
Irene
Jan 6th, 2010
hmmm… why God has to be so unfair? why kenot give handsome rich as hell wan? aisey…
Olie
Jan 7th, 2010
aiyaa… so easy! choose the loving man coz moolahs can be obtained in so many ways provided a big effort to do so… when he’s finally on top of the stairs of success, walaa 3 star!! Loving + Handsome + Rich! Who would want an unloving rich ugly person anyways? There’s no shortcut to happiness… ;-p
Gallivanter
Jan 9th, 2010
Choc Mint Girl – Nice one. Thanks for sharing!
Irene – That’s how life, and I actually think it’s fair, we can’t have everything in life, else it won’t be worth fighting for.
Olie – Cheers!
syam
Jan 12th, 2010
Choosing love over money could be the most dumbo decision if the love suddenly goes wrong. So it has to be equally balanced. For me, all I want is an honest man who cares about me.
claire bennet
Jan 14th, 2010
not really well to do? no worries there. i’m a how-to-get-rich-in-12days guru… wakaka
walaubagaimanapun, chemistry is still the most important..can’t survive without a good and healthy sex.
mel
Jan 15th, 2010
call me conservative….
its not just money or looks to think about there is more to it..
like what his family is like? will the girl fit in the family…
how would the girl mingle with the family…
how would the gal balance family n career …
is she the right one for him..
the is about if the gal n the guy r ok for each other…do they get each other… how do they solve issues among them n even the family…
well i think there is just more than looks or money…
Kenneth
Jan 24th, 2010
Lazy women will choose wealthy men.
Handsome guy will choose beautiful and lazy women.
Ugly is human natural perception, if your mature you won’t have this kind of thinking.
All humans are almost the same but not perfect.